Some random things I noticed while wondering why the fuck we were taught to play the recorder in elementary school:

I like the way the young people dress in this city. Mostly very casual and stylish. A bunch of them could definitely pass as if they were from the LES or Williamsburg. Once in a while I see some dude in a button down with shoes and always think to myself, ‘that guy is probably an asshole’. Except for the few times I wore a button down and shoes since I’ve been here, in which case I think to myself, ‘that guy is definitely an asshole’.

I’ll take a mcflurry over gelato every day of the week and twice on Sunday…and I have.

The hottest thing I’ve seen on the beach so far. (The girl isn’t bad either)

Email from my mom last week with the subject ‘look what is happening!!!!’:

Hey…me again..

YOU NEED TO COME HOME!!!!
Big happenings this week-end at Governors Island…..Snoop Dog, A Tribe Called Quest, WU-TANG CLAN,Rakim[?] KRS-ONE, Lauryn Hill and others…How can this happen without YOU!!!!…are all giving a show……

Obviously I was well aware of this concert. Adding to a weekend that included Adam and Luke’s birthdays, this was one of those times when I would have loved being in NYC. I just can’t believe that none of you actually stepped up and went to see it in my absence. I’m quite confident that if I was in NY, I would have been there with a crew at least 10 deep, and that includes you, and you, and you. Grow up people. Start making things happen on your own.

I spent one night with a bunch of smart kids. I met a girl named Alli who is just starting her 2-year MBA program here. We have mutual friends in NY who put us in contact. My first night out with her she took me to an MBA apartment party. All the kids from all over the world who just arrived in Barcelona, just as she had, to begin their program, were all hanging out at one of the student’s apartments. And me. There seem to be 2 rival grad schools here, and this party was a mix of students from both (think Dillon and East Dillon for all of you FNL fans). So, the common first question when everyone met one another was, ‘are you Dillon or East Dillon?’ (don’t remember the real names). My response of ‘neither’, followed by a raise of my middle finger, was shocking to most (I even added a verbal ‘fuck you’ depending on what hemisphere I supposed the question asker was from). Overall, my story got the biggest response of the night. Probably just cause it was different than everyone else in the room, but nonetheless, people were intrigued. I met people from Singapore, Canada, India, London, Korea, France, SanFran, Michigan, Australia, and a couple who recently lived in NYC. Will I ever see them again? Who knows?

When I see something I think I may wanna put in a post like this I usually type it into the memo pad on my blackberry. I have something written there that reads, ‘Grab balls 5star’. I have no idea what it means or what I’m referring to.

Just like in many foreign countries, I get asked if I want drugs on the street all the time. I can’t walk down La Rambla or the neighboring streets without some dude (usually Moroccan) trying to get my attention by saying something like ‘hashish? smoke? coke?’. It’s REALLY starting to bother me. Not so much the general idea of it, but the fact that some of the dudes who ask me are the same every day. There are 2 I really have my eye on, and if they catch me in the wrong moment, I may snap. I kind of hope it happens because the blog post that follows will be mad entertaining.

I’ve heard some rumblings, both directly and indirectly, of people thinking about coming to visit in October. Think again. Check the Calendario. I’m pretty booked up.

Football rules in America, we all know that. However, basketball is clearly the biggest sport internationally. I’ve had very intelligent conversations about the NBA here, and the people involved in those convos know absolutely nothing about the NFL. There are hoops jerseys everywhere. To my delight, Lakers jerseys completely dominate the landscape. I’d guess 75% of all the jerseys I’ve seen are Kobe. I assume the Laker love has to do with Pau Gasol being from Barcelona, and his jersey is the 2nd most popular. Aside from that, there’s been a handful of Celtic’s, with KG beating out Pierce by a few. Other than that it’s totally random. I’ve seen a Calderon (represent espana), a Ginobili (dude must’ve been from Argentina), a few LeBron Cavs (fuck them), and a handful of Jordans.

On the beach, there are a ton of thai chicks (Jack talk Thai) that offer massages on the beach for 5 euros. I love massages as much as the next guy, but the constant badgering gets really annoying. A couple weeks ago, one of the chicks comes up to me, offering the massage. She was aggressive, touching my shoulders, telling me how great her massage is. I look up and say, ’happy ending??’. She laughs and replies, ‘muy malo’, while the Slovenian kid to my right cracked up.

I got my first pedicure last week. As most of you know, I have world-class feet. I searched for a while and finally found a random little place. It wasn’t the type of place I’m used to. They put me in a closet basically.

Then, my little asian friend rolled in a little tub for me to put my feet in that she had to plug into the wall. Yes, I said ‘plugged into the wall’.

She actually ended up giving me a great pedicure. Then I got an awesome massage. No happy ending there either.

When I’m cooking shit on the bbq on my roof, and at the same time cooking shit on the stove downstairs in the kitchen, I always think when I run downstairs that one of the seagull type birds that hover around my hood is gonna swoop down and grab something off my grill.

Chinga Usted.